sex is not the problem, lust is. book review @500

Sex is not the problem. Lust is. That's the new title of 'Not even a Hint", which was briefly reviewed at 500, our evening fellowship at NDCCC. It's been 2.5 years since I've been married, 3.5 years since I've read the book. But it all still makes sense and is relevant. I'm still reminiscing parts of what I remember in my single days from this sweet book on sex, protecting and nurturing Christian sexuality, for the wonderful gift of sex in marriage.

I still struggle. So do all other Christian men and women. No one has defeated lust. That is the summary of the opening pages. But there is the gracious reminder of the good God who created sex and meant it for our fullest enjoyment of this gift. Josh always reminds us of the Holy God who is willing to forgive freely, and restore us in relationship with Him.

The book is easy to read, with short biting chapters. Some helpful hints I remember are:

It's not good to be a lone ranger.

The help of non-judgemental Christian friends who will pray and point us toward holiness is necessary.

Understanding of how different guys and gals struggle with sexuality allows us to be helpful toward one another. 

Perhaps one of the most promising ideas is: sex is meant for loving another, it is other person centred. Sex was made by God as a means of expressing a very special love. It is not to be self-centred. So, what does this say about certain acts of masturbation? What does this mean in when and how we make-love to our spouses? Whose enjoyment and good are we seeking in sex? These made sex a very noble task in my mind. It was certainly a consistent look at sex that is totally against the grain of our stupid and selfish world that lies: seek your own pleasure, do what you want, it is your need and right. God's advice is seeking another's pleasure, doing what is best for them and foregoing our own needs, this applies even in sex. And be surprised, the pleasure in return is all the more greater. God is no spoiler, He designed us for the highest pleasures.

Christian Guys and Girls, read books such as these. They are a fresh wind in a dank, dark and seedy world of lust, self-gratification and waste. It's not an end-it-all book, but another tool we use against lust.

p.s. check out my pastor's short blog on pornography and how to slowly fight it.

p.p.s. the cover is slick too, your friends may willing to take a peek.