Book Review: Purity in the Age of Porn

It's a hard topic to raise in Sunday conversations at church. We know the impact, but we fear the implications on sin at work in our churches. If you're like me, you might fear the paralytic hold this sin has on people.



Matthias Media has produced a Mini-Magazine (Minizine) on pornography, which exposes the true effects of pornography (James Warren), the centrality of Jesus' death and resurrection in dealing with sexual sin (Gordon Cheng) and practical points in resisting viewing of pornography on the Internet (Simon Roberts). It's a simple and gracious exploration on the topic, one which I would feel confident in giving away to any brother or even non-Christian friend to read.

What the Minizine does well is to dispel some lies on pornography with Biblical insight and social research. Lies such like: viewing pornography is harmless, it brings real or even superior sexual fulfilment, or that it's within our nature and we cannot stop it. I was made more confident of my convictions after reading James' segment, that pornography can and does cost a lot more than what most people imagine, in terms of relationships, marriages, self-esteem and even the ability to enjoy sex.

James makes it clear that there is a good way - the best way - for our sexual desires to be fulfilled in accordance with God's plan for marriage. It is the most happy place for other-person-centred sex and one where there is most enjoyment. We are encouraged to proclaim that God designed sex and knows how we can best enjoy it. Any other material designed to elicit desire is pornography and is a far cry that takes away more than it offers.

There is a place of the Good News of Jesus' death and resurrection in combating pornography, indeed all other immoralities. Gordon's illustration from Paul's letter to a very immoral Corinthian church is relevant to us in the 21st century. What we excel in sexual sin, they probably did better and earlier by more than a millennium. It was delightful to hear that there is good news and forgiveness for the sexually immoral and that in Jesus' resurrection there is certain hope that this guilty, shameful body with its emotional and physical scars of sexual immorality will be restored for good.

But for all its practical help, especially in the section on Internet usage, its clear expose of pornography's harms and the deliverance from sin in Jesus, the Minizine does not mention how we can use the gospel to help break the "pornography cycle".

The addiction cycle, begins with viewing, then continues in sexual climax, then results in depression from guilt and finally the need to feel good again. And it is this need to feel good that requires an antidote of the God of Good News. We need an alternative, a relationship, a person, that holdouts fulfilment and the promise of comfort, right at the point where we have failed and are filled with guilt after consuming pornography. Practical inhibitions will reduce the amount consumed, understanding the ills of climaxing to pornography will help us control the self, knowing Jesus forgives our guilt and shame, but it is a desire for fulfilment in God alone - that will alone prevent anyone from having to find contentment in pornography, and from many other immoralities like greed, ambition and gluttony

sex is not the problem, lust is. book review @500

Sex is not the problem. Lust is. That's the new title of 'Not even a Hint", which was briefly reviewed at 500, our evening fellowship at NDCCC. It's been 2.5 years since I've been married, 3.5 years since I've read the book. But it all still makes sense and is relevant. I'm still reminiscing parts of what I remember in my single days from this sweet book on sex, protecting and nurturing Christian sexuality, for the wonderful gift of sex in marriage.

I still struggle. So do all other Christian men and women. No one has defeated lust. That is the summary of the opening pages. But there is the gracious reminder of the good God who created sex and meant it for our fullest enjoyment of this gift. Josh always reminds us of the Holy God who is willing to forgive freely, and restore us in relationship with Him.

The book is easy to read, with short biting chapters. Some helpful hints I remember are:

It's not good to be a lone ranger.

The help of non-judgemental Christian friends who will pray and point us toward holiness is necessary.

Understanding of how different guys and gals struggle with sexuality allows us to be helpful toward one another. 

Perhaps one of the most promising ideas is: sex is meant for loving another, it is other person centred. Sex was made by God as a means of expressing a very special love. It is not to be self-centred. So, what does this say about certain acts of masturbation? What does this mean in when and how we make-love to our spouses? Whose enjoyment and good are we seeking in sex? These made sex a very noble task in my mind. It was certainly a consistent look at sex that is totally against the grain of our stupid and selfish world that lies: seek your own pleasure, do what you want, it is your need and right. God's advice is seeking another's pleasure, doing what is best for them and foregoing our own needs, this applies even in sex. And be surprised, the pleasure in return is all the more greater. God is no spoiler, He designed us for the highest pleasures.

Christian Guys and Girls, read books such as these. They are a fresh wind in a dank, dark and seedy world of lust, self-gratification and waste. It's not an end-it-all book, but another tool we use against lust.

p.s. check out my pastor's short blog on pornography and how to slowly fight it.

p.p.s. the cover is slick too, your friends may willing to take a peek.